So, I'm home, have been since saturday night last week...for the first time ever, the plane was within an hour of it's scheduled landing time, and despite being overpacked, for a miracle, i got all of my luggage (but i've been getting lucky in this regard pretty frequently.  still, it doesn't do to complain about it)...

anyways, lately, on my so called vacation, I have been drowned in errands, with lots of things to get done before the year ends and classes begin again...

yes, that's correct folks, for those of you whose primary mode of keeping in touch with me is this blog, classes will begin again...

see the thing is, I have to take the usmle's at some point in march/april...this is a massively important test, possibly the most important one i'll be taking...but i'm not going to go into details because to do so would scare me yet more than I am already...anyways, the point is, I'm going to have to study my ass off for it, because it's very challenging, and I simply have to 1. pass it and 2. do well on it...

therefore, I will be almost or completely UNAVAILABLE between January 5th to sometime in March or April, date as yet undetermined...I plan on giving myself one evening off per week, but my schedule is a bit erratic, which means i can't even predict what day that will be (thankyou kaplan for making no sense!)....So if any of you there want my time, call me back now and schedule while there's still time!  

and for those of you whom i owe a phone call to, i'm dreadfully sorry for not having gotten back to you...

just thought i'd post this for my people in ny as fair warning however...

Oh yeah, made a really pretty looking bread today with that no knead bread recipe...there really is no point to buying a bread maker, because this took all of 15 minutes of prep time, and I goofed it up majorly and it still came out alright...my mommy said it tasted professional...(actually mom doesn't say things like that too often either, so it sounds funny, but that does mean something)....

anyways, off i go to get back to doing laundry / baking cookies / returning phone calls...

Once upon a time, there was an innocent, unassuming, and perhaps naive medical student we shall call Nina who was trying to leave the rock with less than 10,000 tons to ship home.  So, she decided to sell some of her things using the classifieds section of her medical school's website.  Immediately, she got many responses for the mundane wares she had to sell, including five offers for facewash!  But most obnoxious and pushy of them all, was a woman who sent a slightly rude (in that it was not friendly at all, not that some insult was used) email with bad grammer.  Twice.  So, Nina decided, "if this woman is rude, I just won't sell anything to her!"

     However, the very reasonable Ashley (note, this is Ashley, not Krashley, not that Krashley does not possess moments of reasonableness occasionally) suggested that perhaps it was wiser to simply tolerate the obnoxious woman so that the heinous task of selling Nina's wares might be finished.  So Nina acceded to this reasonable suggestion, and allowed the woman to visit her apartment with a friend, at an unholy hour of far too close to dawn (8 AM to be precise.)  Upon approaching the doorway, the woman smiled, and appeared polite, her campus accounts department employee suit looking ironed and crisp, mauve and professional.  Nina, being once again naive, let her in, saying "come in, would you like some tea?"  And all the while, totally unaware of what she had started. 

     From there proceeded a fair sale of goods, until the second woman arrived, and she seemed even friendlier, yet still professional.  Nina thought to herself, my was Ashley right, these people seem far nicer than their email let on.  But as the sales began to proceed onwards, the creatures Nina thought were mere women began to undergo a steady change, a metomorphosis if you will.  Coats were taken off to let large, feathery wings protrude farther outside of the backs of what were once women, with black dingy looking feathers.  Noses grew long and bulbous, turning into beaks with razor sharp edges.  Feet developed sharp, black claws, appropriate for tearing the flesh of innocent medical students.  The creatures that seemed only a few minutes ago to be mild mannered, polite women suddenly began picking things up, asking how much they were, circling the entire apartment, like the vultures they were, for dead matter to collect for themselves.  They were impatiently waiting for the med student's short life in the caribbean to fade away, leaving tasty morsels like what they hoped were even-cheaper-than-you-can-get-in-the-US brita filters, empty jars, and other tidbits lifted without permission from the table where the parts of Nina's life lay.  The women even offered that a friend of theirs would buy the dish set. 

      Nina, realising that the end truly was near, consented to the sale of her possessions, and said she would wait one week for the third vulture to collect money to pay her up front, in advance, for the wares she wished to purchase.  But the next week came, as did the vulture's paycheck and the vulture did not have the money for the dishes.  "I'll come and give you a downpayment" she said!  "I'll budget the money and have it for you next week" she said!  But Nina was not quite that naive, and would not stand down, clinging firmly to her demands.  So, in the end, after more than one round of the vulture's game, Nina decided, a life lived is best ended by giving the remains that weren't already sold to a place where she will not be cheated, and it may benefit the ones that receive it.  All of the rest of the goods were from then on destined for the orphanage or the cleaning lady and other sundry employees in the apartment complex upon the day before Nina leaves this fair Isle.  Except for the pads.  Nina noticed she forgot an agreement she made with the third vulture and sold them to her after all.  

The end (hopefully)

Oh yeah, some parts of this story may have been just slightly edited.  Except for the part about "fair" Isle.  I'm sorry, I still can't complement this place quite that much without feeling like it's a lie.  It's not bad looking, but it's like saying one's sister is a wise, kind, human being who has matured into a paragon among women (this is an exaggeration bordering on total lie, but one I use for example):  it simply does not feel correct!  Even were it true, to utter the words would surely lead to a spontaneous, fiery death, my remains a mere pile of ashes on the swively desk chair. 



 

Quite soon, I will be leaving Grenada, getting on a jet plane, and I won't know when i'll be back again, if at all...
I sold a leftover container that I've had for almost 10 years today...yes it's stainless steel, and the crannies are starting to rust, but it still feels weird, and like parting with bits of myself by selling things off...

I'm currently waiting for the bread that buried Cincinnati to finish rising again.  Every time I leave it alone it rises to the point of filling a stadium.  I think this is what happens when one doesn't bake for a while.  I lose my ability to gauge how much is enough. 

I'm not sure if a part of me will miss Grenada, or if it's just that I always wanted it but never succeeded in leaving before, but I feel strange.  My stomach was in knots selling things earlier.  And it was up too early, being that the women wanted to come around at 8 am, but that's another story...

And another thing I don't understand:  Why do people get offended if you say you don't like their country?! (and no I didn't say this to someone, I was just talking about it after one of the women buying things asked me if I liked Grenada.  I was polite, promise!) People say that when they come to New York all the time!  I can't count the number if times I've heard about how someone or other doesn't like it in New York and they'd like to go home to their home country.  Usually a few years later this is followed by, oh wow, we managed to get our permanent residency visa here so it looks like we'll be staying, hooray!  Actually one time this was in the midst of trying to settle down in NY permanently.  I had a former boss and her husband tell me about how they hated the food, the people, the weather, the plant life, the houses, the routine, the government, the politics and well, you name it they hated it.  But what did they do as they complained about the country I grew up in so vehemently?  They were trying to get permanent visas so that in this case, they could continue pillaging the US.  I might have a few opinions on this particular boss, but I doubt anyone's interested in hearing about the levels of hell all over again...

But yeah, the point I was trying to make:  Most of us in NY, we hear, " I don't like it here" and we understand.  We know that different places have very different lifestyles and that one way of being is not going to suit everyone.  Perhaps we are more open minded than most, but whatever it is, unless I have to listen to the many problems with NY every single day incessantly, it doesn't really bother me.  Oh wait, this might be how the coffee serving people in Grenada feel then.  They probably do hear it on a daily basis.  Well, whatever, there are still some people out here that should come to grips with the fact that no one place is going to be paradise on earth for everyone.  And hey, give me credit! I don't sit there and complain directly at random serving persons.  I may accidentally say things in front of people that I probably shouldn't have.  But it's a rare day that I will intentionally tell someone to their face that I have been excited to leave the Rock from the week I got here two years ago. 

Oh yes, and in other news:  I must conclude with this link, that I do not understand japanese people, or their taste in clothes.  Volunteering to wear bras.  Why?!  Didn't the women warn them to save themselves while they still could?

So, last week was another one of those dark and desolate weeks that I spent hunched behind a desk nervously cramming in every ounce of information I could possibly squeeze in.  Hopefully I survived it.  Grades seem to be pending currently. 

There was also the election (Go OBAMA!) which was wonderful.  We no longer have to be embarrassed by our president (and hopefully it will stay that way!)  Me and neighbor Dave both watched in astonished awe that night, all the while rationalizing the long break from studying for the final we had the next morning with the fact that we were watching history in the making.  I would go on with political opinions here, but you either agree with me on most of them, or aren't going to no matter what.  To me the election results meant the nation wouldn't be destroyed to the point of possibly permanent damage the way it would have been with McCain as president.  To my father and apparently to the older generation, it meant much more. 

My father quoted Martin Luther King Jr., saying that in his I have a dream speech, he said : "I have a dream that my four little children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin, but by the content of their character." (Ok, to be fair, I got this off of wikipedia, my father wasn't completely spot on, word for word, we don't have photographic memories, but this was what he said essentially.)  And it's happened, it really happened.  The world really has changed a bit in the past fifty years hasn't it, and hopefully will continue to change.  He said when he grew up, things like seperate water fountains and seperate schools existed, (not in New York though right?), making an event like this amazing and moving.  And on a side note, California, I am disappointed in you, that really wasn't very nice of you, voting for Proposition 8 the way you did. 

But back to my life.  I also went to Krashley's birthday dinner friday evening, which went well.  Wayne sang for her, and this time it wasn't even I am cow (one of his favorites, youtube cow song if you're curious.)  Krashley apparently has a rather large herd of friends at her beck and call, and this birthday dinner was rather large, which is good for her!  Last night featured sushi (vegetarian sushi) and a really wonderful cake that Ruth made, amazingly, in a toaster oven. 

This weekend will feature more laziness and hopefully a bit of getting work done (my toenails haven't been painted in months!!) 

Trying to store up and save up and gear up for the yuckiness ahead.  Yes, I like medicine, I used to like medical school before terms 5/6...But, no, I'm not a real big fan of midterms. 

So I've been attempting to study, cooked some, and contracted tonsillitis, most likely from a demonic two year old who came above to our part of the world for the sole purpose of infecting me.  Ok, she was kinda cute, but still, it's not fair!  Why must one get sick whenever one comes within a ten mile radius of a child?! (Don't believe me? Ask Heather, she's a teacher!)  

And, since you probably want something more amusing, I leave you with this link: Some people managed to steal a beach in Jamaica.  Stealing land.  How does one quietly carry off a peice of land, or rather, tons of sand?  Didn't anyone noticed unscheduled truck movements?  Life in the Carribean is strange. 

Well, ok, so midterms have come and gone.  Suffice it to say, I am not pleased by them, and am currently on the Go Home on Time Plan...

I know that much of this is my fault, thanks to the gripping laziness I experienced at the beginning of this term, but quite a bit of it isn't.  You see, one of our classes has started lying to us.  They teach us one thing, far above our heads, and don't give us the notes for it anyways, and then they tell us they will test us on another thing that they're sorry about but we should teach ourselves.  And then they actually test us on a third item altogether.  And the creature running this class has a lot of power, doesn't really put any effort in, messed up monumentally, yet still likes to portray itself as the heroic father to a bunch of naughty, lazy schoolchildren.  It won't admit to it's faults, and instead blames everything on us, feeding us lies all the while. 

     So Ishie, being very brave, posted something on a bulletin board to the chancellor, which lead a few others to follow, posting their own opinions to the chancellor.  Part of me really wants to make my own voice heard.  And part of me is afraid of the things they are capable of doing in retaliation.  People have already warned Ishie that if she tried to take the prof in question down, it would crush her, and the warnings are probably right.  But what of the school?  I know schools have done things to students that aren't entirely fair or legal in the past, what about now?  Will I risk giving up medical school, an idea I can't fathom?

           My mother is adamantly against my posting anything, putting my name to anything.  She has said, in her own experience, that mouthpieces are well loved when they volunteer to be courageous, but when the going gets rough, everyone else backs away and the mouthpiece is left to be blamed alone.  She fears that I will end up facing the consequences alone (or in a small group of people, but you get my point.)  Her words are borne of many years of experience, and truthfully, she's rarely wrong about such things.  I don't have much in the way of diplomatic ability, and am quite good at getting myself into situations thanks to opening my big mouth, so I am well aware that sometimes, it is wiser for me to take trusted advice than to make my own decisions without it. 

          And then there's Dave's opinion.  If you see a wrong being done and you don't take action, then you condone the action.  If you want to take action but don't for fear of consequences, you are a coward.  There is no room for a consequence too big to risk.  I am a coward by his logic. 

       And then there's the opinion that me and Noi worked out in our conversation.  In war, people generally try to know their enemy before taking action.  Sun Tzu has probably said something about this, I just can't quote it precisely because I don't remember. The thing is, I don't really know my enemy, so I do not really know if I am aiming at a sack of flour or a pack of wolves. I do not know my enemy's next move, or what would motivate it.  I also don't know the power of what I do, or what method would be the most effective, so I don't know my weapon.  And I don't honestly know my rights if something were to happen, so I don't really know the terrain very well either.  Perhaps it's wiser for me to wait until I know more information. 

Whatever it is, I don't like this situation.  

Exams week has struck again, thus, I've been spending much of my time finding handy excuses for why I should be eating this bit of junk food, or that cookie, and telling myself I can't be updating my blog when I should be studying.  So I'll be breif:


In the news on my rss feed: couple gets killed having train-tracks sex...well, I hope they died happy...Apparently the train conductor tried to warn them and they wouldn't listen...

And the exam we took today?  Let's see, our professors tested us on things we had no notice of, many of us found it really difficult, and even the smart people are saying it felt like multiple guess...So yeah, I broke down and bought two packages of cookies.  I'm hoping to convince my body that cookies are only meant to be eaten in dainty portions with afternoon tea; and not in giant handfuls thrown into the mouth at speed without pause for tasting.  Maybe if I can convince myself that moderation can taste good, I'll avoid midterms weight gain and diabetes.  And strangely? I've been craving healthy foods, like salads and things.  Sadly, the rock is not known for it's green leafy vegetables (and all of you classmates will exclaim, but they have calalloo! and I say to you, a vegetable that is poisonous when not cooked doesn't seem nutritionally worth the trouble.  I like cooking vegetables, but I'd like to think it's not something I do to keep them from killing me.  If a food is going to be semi-deadly, I may as well enjoy it a bit more and make it something dessert or junkfood like.  )

In the morning I had hospital rotations in the orthopedics department (more on this later.)  As it turns out, I happen to have an ankle injury, and figured, well, orthopedics is sort of the area in question for me too, so why not have the doctor in the hospital check me while I'm here?  Yeah, after seeing the giant remains of an abscess (collection of infectious fluid in the body) get drained, I decided that exposing an open wound next to that might not be a wise decision.  So, after rotations, I went to the on campus clinic to have myself examined.  Various well intentioned classmates have already suggested a variety of possible diagnoses and potential outcomes, so I figured, well, why not go to the doctor, just to be on the safe side.  

    Two hours later, the doctor gave me a prescription for antibiotics and told me I had a sprained ankle.  My lateral malleolus (the bump on the outside of ur ankle) is not in the position it's supposed to be in either.  Because I don't have enough to do two weeks away from midterms, and to be on the safe side, the doctor also suggested I get an x-ray of the ankle in question.  And furthermore, since my life was really getting too convenient as it was, he decided I should be walking on crutches for the time being, because apparently walking on an injured ankle isn't a good idea when what it needs is rest.  Go figure.  And yeah, this makes me appreciate the disabilities organizations in the USA that no doubt lobbied and pushed for disability laws and all of those lovely, usable ramps and elevators we have all over the country.  And I also really, really appreciate the fact that Long Island, the place I consider home, is FLAT and gets cold!  And if not for the climate and terrain, what is it about the Caribbean that  makes me accident prone? 

   Oh, and rotations at the hospital today:  Rotations featured the reason people don't want to go into pediatrics: It's the innocent people that haven't done anything to cause it that end up with the shittiest things happening to them.  And they're really cool about letting you examine said unfortunate events, with very little complaint or screaming.  They also let you pummel them with questions, and patiently answer what they can and don't complain about the questions, physical exams or even what's happening to them, despite having every right to.  It must take pretty stern stuff to be able to stomach a lifetime of pediatrics. 

     The next patient we saw featured a wonderful example of why taking the diabetes medication and following the diet plan one's healthcare professional recommends is a good idea.  Since it would seem that my readers generally do not need public service announcements, I will refrain from placing one here.  If you're curious about what nasty things await people that don't care for their diabetes, wikipedia search "gangrene."  This isn't what I saw in the hospital, because I'm too lazy to go crazy searching google for an image of what I saw.  This is however what I tried to convince my parents to show a diabetic relative of ours in an attempt to help motivate her (I thought perhaps she could stick this to the fridge if necessary, but maybe my thinking is a bit extreme.)  My parents thought this was too gross and didn't believe me as to how common this is.  And if anyone finds a picture of a "really large and nasty looking staphylococcus aureus abscess," go right a head and send me the link. 

    Anyhow, speaking of being virtuous, I have studying to do! 

So last Saturday was the alternative medicine selective and thankfully, this year, no one tried to sell me anything, or con me, and they were all generally interesting polite instructors.  Of course, realize I am saying this from the perspective of the always-asleep-in-class, so there are some aspects of my critique that I honestly don't know the answer to because I was not mentally present for it. 

Anyways, I was on the way to a workshop in Qi Gong,a martial/medicinal art when lo and behold, there was an extra step below my feet that I didn't expect to be there, which caused me to fall and injure my ankle.  This is what happens when one is looking ahead to see if the gate to the beach is opened and not at one's own feet.  Mommies are right, looking where you're going is important!  I will likely be limping for quite a few weeks now, and any intentions of being virtuous and getting regular exercise have gone out the window thanks to many people telling me that walking on an injury is perhaps not good for it.  Making an honest attempt to be lazier so as to improve upon my health is a really strange feeling.  Oh yeah, and the martial/medicinal art?  As I sat there waiting for the PA to come check out my ankle, all it seemed that they were doing was jumping up and down in place.  This marks the first time someone promoted jumping up and down as being good for self defense/health.  Ah well, I'm no expert, so perhaps I'm missing something.   

Many thanks to the students whose names I don't know that actually took care of me and went so far as to carry me under the tent that day to keep me out of the sun.    And to the maintenence van that was fortunate enough to stop by and carry me up the hill when the campus ambulance wasn't available.  I worry about what happens when there is a real emergency.  I want to go home, where things are safer. 

This week marked the cardiology week in pathophysiology.  Our notes didn't appear until the last hour of 8 hours worth of lecture, and then they were out of sequence and horribly incomplete.  Furthermore, the instructor was teaching subjects he felt were important with total disregard to the material we actually needed to know or could comprehend.  This week, even the smart people (like people that aren't me) sat in wide eyed horror as our visiting professor covered material that we won't have to learn for at least a year, and do not yet have the ability to comprehend.  Will they be putting out the correct notes, or giving lectures on the material we actually have to know? I doubt it.  Medical students don't count after all, we just pay tuition and create the school's good name.  But this is just another week in medical school. 

And what did they say to me when I suggested to a clinical tutor from a particular department we all know and love that someone could actually go approve a copy of the notes before the copy center printed out 400 copies of it in the wrong order? (Rather than the weekly misprint we receive, and no, for those of you not going to medical school, I am not kidding about the weekly part.) 

           A student taking anywhere from 22-23 credits should add yet another task to their schedule and go to the copy center to check the sequencing of notes he or she did not write and does not know the sequence of to make sure they are in order.  Clinical tutors and professors that are getting paid to carry out professional jobs and are intelligent enough to have earned MDs and PhDs in some cases shouldn't have to be bothered doing their own job, no, that would be too much work.  FIfteen minutes in the copy center would be far, far too much work in a day one is getting PAID for.  It doesn't matter that people depend on those notes, professors shouldn't have to be bothered. 


But I try to avoid spending every entry of this blog whining about administrative problems in school.  Instead, I will add, that it has been rainy all day, the wind has been blowing, but fortunately, I'm told the hurricane is too far north to affect us.  The temperature is below 3000 degrees for the first time this term too, which is a nice break. 

ok, so, i'm feeling a bit lazy, thus, i will briefly update you all on this week's events and show you a link to keep you busy...

monday featured my first hospital rotation on the rock, ever...i got to go play in neonatology, er, rather, it was work, yes, that's it, work...well, if you want to be realistic about it, doing physicals on babies that are less than 24 hours old that essentially involve poking around their little heads and bellies, tricking them into doing all sorts of things like opening their eyes or mouth (the torture of it all!), throwing their little arms up for you, grabbing your finger and making them extend their itsy bitsy widdle toes really doesn't feel like work...and they say people get paid to do that all day too...hey, as long as i don't have to change the diapers, sounds good to me...

and then there was pharmacology, which is really, really, scary, but you know that if you've been reading this blog...

and now, for more cuteness: according to krashley, this is what i look like in class.  i leave you to make your own judgement: 

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